It's not the danger... it's the fun

Italian. Cynic. Lazy. Weird sense of humor. Books eater. Science and History lover. TV shows addicted.

And theres nothing in this worldThat I know that I wont doTo be near you everydayEvery hour every minuteTake my hand and let me lead the wayAll thru your lifeIll be by your sideTill death do us partWhite Lion, Till death do us part (1991)

And theres nothing in this world
That I know that I wont do
To be near you everyday
Every hour every minute
Take my hand and let me lead the way
All thru your life
Ill be by your side
Till death do us part


White Lion, Till death do us part (1991)

Palmer: “Morning.”McGee: “You been here all night?”Palmer: “Yeah. Yeah… I had some work to finish up. Dr. Mallard and I have a flight in, uh… two hours. He’s coming with me. Uhm… but I-I got your text. Uh, you guys need me for something?”McGee: “We know you’re going through with the wedding…”Palmer: “Yeah, hey, hey I totally understand. You guys can’t come.”Ziva: “Which is why we wanted to personally see you off. And… give you our wedding gifts.”Palmer: “Ziva! I don’t even know what to say. I’m gonna open it, obviously.”Ziva: “No, no, no, wait, wait, wait! Actually, you should open it with your bride.”Palmer: “Right. Yeah.”Ziva: “But I will tell you what it is. The finest Israeli cotton sheets, so you sleep like a baby… Or maybe make one.”Palmer: “Yeah. I’m… a little anxious about that part. You know, expectations are high.”McGee: “This is a wireless long-range security camera. For those nights when you’re working here and Breena’s stuck home alone. Also, you can eventually use it as a baby monitor.”Palmer: “That is awesome, Tim! I… I’m speechless.”Tony: “Well, you won’t be speechless for long, my little Autopsy Gremlin. Huh? The gift that keeps on giving.”Ziva: “What is that, a movie?”Tony: “No. It’s a film. The 1963 Jean-Luc Godard masterpiece, Contempt.”McGee: “You got that at Christmas. You’re re-gifting, Tony.”Tony: “… It’s not re-gifting if you’ve already watched it on Netflix.”Palmer: “Tony, thank you. Come here!”Tony: “Oh, come on…”Palmer: “You guys, bring it in. Come on, everybody.”Tony: “Bring it in. It’s a group grope.”~ 9x24 “Till Death Do Us Part”

Palmer: “Morning.”
McGee: “You been here all night?”
Palmer: “Yeah. Yeah… I had some work to finish up. Dr. Mallard and I have a flight in, uh… two hours. He’s coming with me. Uhm… but I-I got your text. Uh, you guys need me for something?”
McGee: “We know you’re going through with the wedding…”
Palmer: “Yeah, hey, hey I totally understand. You guys can’t come.”
Ziva: “Which is why we wanted to personally see you off. And… give you our wedding gifts.”
Palmer: “Ziva! I don’t even know what to say. I’m gonna open it, obviously.”
Ziva: “No, no, no, wait, wait, wait! Actually, you should open it with your bride.”
Palmer: “Right. Yeah.”
Ziva: “But I will tell you what it is. The finest Israeli cotton sheets, so you sleep like a baby… Or maybe make one.”
Palmer: “Yeah. I’m… a little anxious about that part. You know, expectations are high.”
McGee: “This is a wireless long-range security camera. For those nights when you’re working here and Breena’s stuck home alone. Also, you can eventually use it as a baby monitor.”
Palmer: “That is awesome, Tim! I… I’m speechless.”
Tony: “Well, you won’t be speechless for long, my little Autopsy Gremlin. Huh? The gift that keeps on giving.”
Ziva: “What is that, a movie?”
Tony: “No. It’s a film. The 1963 Jean-Luc Godard masterpiece, Contempt.”
McGee: “You got that at Christmas. You’re re-gifting, Tony.”
Tony: “… It’s not re-gifting if you’ve already watched it on Netflix.”
Palmer: “Tony, thank you. Come here!”
Tony: “Oh, come on…”
Palmer: “You guys, bring it in. Come on, everybody.”
Tony: “Bring it in. It’s a group grope.”

~ 9x24 “Till Death Do Us Part”

Tony: “He’s… he’s back!” [faking a phone call] “How many bodies did you say you found?”McGee: “Now, calm down. Tell me again, what floor was the explosion on? … I thought I heard it ring.”Palmer: “Oh, come on! You guys, just give me one hint as to what Abby has planned. It is my bachelor party, okay? I’ve got a right to know.”Tony: “Sorry. She swore us to secrecy, and… she scares me more than you.”Palmer: “God! Think I made a big mistake making her my best man.”McGee: “Relax, Jimmy. Everything’s fine. Just make sure you’re up on your hepatitis vaccinations.”Palmer: “Hepatitis?”Tony: “And get a good pair of knee pads.”McGee: “And a good helmet.”Palmer: “… You guys are messing with me.”Tony: “Are we? Two words.”McGee: “Abby. Sciuto.”Tony: [when Palmer’s gone] “… What is Abby planning?”McGee: “You know, I’m still not really sure.”~ 9x23 “Up in Smoke”

Tony: “He’s… he’s back!” [faking a phone call] “How many bodies did you say you found?”
McGee: “Now, calm down. Tell me again, what floor was the explosion on? … I thought I heard it ring.”
Palmer: “Oh, come on! You guys, just give me one hint as to what Abby has planned. It is my bachelor party, okay? I’ve got a right to know.”
Tony: “Sorry. She swore us to secrecy, and… she scares me more than you.”
Palmer: “God! Think I made a big mistake making her my best man.”
McGee: “Relax, Jimmy. Everything’s fine. Just make sure you’re up on your hepatitis vaccinations.”
Palmer: “Hepatitis?”
Tony: “And get a good pair of knee pads.”
McGee: “And a good helmet.”
Palmer: “… You guys are messing with me.”
Tony: “Are we? Two words.”
McGee: “Abby. Sciuto.”
Tony: [when Palmer’s gone] “… What is Abby planning?”
McGee: “You know, I’m still not really sure.”

~ 9x23 “Up in Smoke”

Abby: “Tony can be so transparent.”McGee: “You think?”Abby: “Yeah. He came down here asking me about thermite… but, really, he was fishing. He was trying to find out what Ziva had planned for the weekend.”McGee: “You didn’t tell him, did you?”Abby: “Of course not!”McGee: “It’s driving him crazy.”Abby: “Yeah, but it’s just Pilates weekend with her landlady.”McGee: “Yeah, but that’s not what Tony’s dirty little mind is thinking.”~ 9x22 “Playing with Fire”

Abby: “Tony can be so transparent.”
McGee: “You think?”
Abby: “Yeah. He came down here asking me about thermite… but, really, he was fishing. He was trying to find out what Ziva had planned for the weekend.”
McGee: “You didn’t tell him, did you?”
Abby: “Of course not!”
McGee: “It’s driving him crazy.”
Abby: “Yeah, but it’s just Pilates weekend with her landlady.”
McGee: “Yeah, but that’s not what Tony’s dirty little mind is thinking.”

~ 9x22 “Playing with Fire”

Tony: “We missing something, boss?”Gibbs: “Yeah. How any of this connects to the damn Navy.”Tony: “Well, we haven’t really heard from Abby in a while… Maybe she and Jason found something?”Gibbs: “…”Abby: [on the phone with Gibbs] “Gibbs, can you come to the lab?”Gibbs: “Yeah, Abbs. I’ll be right down.”Tony: “… It’s a gift.”~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

Tony: “We missing something, boss?”
Gibbs: “Yeah. How any of this connects to the damn Navy.”
Tony: “Well, we haven’t really heard from Abby in a while… Maybe she and Jason found something?”
Gibbs: “…”
Abby: [on the phone with Gibbs] “Gibbs, can you come to the lab?”
Gibbs: “Yeah, Abbs. I’ll be right down.”
Tony: “… It’s a gift.”

~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Tony’s catching up on his case reports. What’s wrong?”Ziva: “He’s been this way ever since he got back from the cargo ship… We have to ask him about this.”McGee: “Yeah.”Tony: “… Can I help you?”McGee: “Is that you, Tony?”Ziva: “Be honest. Is that you?”Tony: “Yeah.”Ziva: “You saved Jason from a fire?”Tony: “It was the kid’s lucky day.”Ziva: “… Okay. What happened?”Tony: “… Final Four was in Baltimore. Getting ready to play UCLA. Basketball, Ziva.”Ziva: “And?”Tony: “… And I was out for a walk. I was trying to clear my head, focus for the game. And I saw smoke coming out of this townhouse. I heard a scream… so I went in.”Ziva: “… How come you never told us? You should be proud.”Tony: “… It was more complicated than that … I had to make a choice. Save Jason… or risk all of us getting killed trying to save his sister. I chose … She was four.”~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Tony’s catching up on his case reports. What’s wrong?”
Ziva: “He’s been this way ever since he got back from the cargo ship… We have to ask him about this.”
McGee: “Yeah.”
Tony: “… Can I help you?”
McGee: “Is that you, Tony?”
Ziva: “Be honest. Is that you?”
Tony: “Yeah.”
Ziva: “You saved Jason from a fire?”
Tony: “It was the kid’s lucky day.”
Ziva: “… Okay. What happened?”
Tony: “… Final Four was in Baltimore. Getting ready to play UCLA. Basketball, Ziva.”
Ziva: “And?”
Tony: “… And I was out for a walk. I was trying to clear my head, focus for the game. And I saw smoke coming out of this townhouse. I heard a scream… so I went in.”
Ziva: “… How come you never told us? You should be proud.”
Tony: “… It was more complicated than that … I had to make a choice. Save Jason… or risk all of us getting killed trying to save his sister. I chose … She was four.”

~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Were you aware of Plimpton’s history with Watcher Fleet?”Murdoch: “Watcher Fleet? No. But… he was always going on about Skyrim and Old Republic…? You are talking about dorky role-playing games, right? You must be into those, uh?”McGee: “Until I took an arrow in the knee.”~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Were you aware of Plimpton’s history with Watcher Fleet?”
Murdoch: “Watcher Fleet? No. But… he was always going on about Skyrim and Old Republic…? You are talking about dorky role-playing games, right? You must be into those, uh?”
McGee: “Until I took an arrow in the knee.”

~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Spent the last four years in their electrical component department.”Tony: “This is exciting stuff!”McGee: “Tony, don’t jump to any conclusions, okay? Just ‘cause the guy has a nerdy job, it does not mean that he’s… Okay, he was… single. And he ran a Skyrim message board.”Tony: “How many cats did he have?”McGee: “None. But, apparently, he did have a thing for Japanese anime pillows.”Tony: “Oh. That’s unfortunate… Although, she’s kinda hot.”Ziva: “It’s a cartoon, Tony.”Tony: “Hey, don’t knock the cartoon ladies. You got your Betty Rubble, your Ariel from The Little Mermaid, and Jessica Rabbit… Those ladies got me through puberty.”Ziva: “You’ve been through puberty? Had not noticed.”Tony: “Ha ha. Well, you noticed Jason King. What is it with chicks and firemen? And don’t say hoses.”McGee: “I wasn’t going to.”Ziva: “He’s not a fireman. But, yes, your cop friend is very, uhm… hot.”Tony: “He’s not my friend. I met him once, 20 years ago… I’m actually kind of surprised he recognized me.”Ziva: “Well, clearly, your first meeting was important to him.”McGee: “I, uh… assume it involved a girl?”Tony: “… He was nine years old.”Gibbs: “Never assume, McGee.”McGee: “Rule Number Eight. Got it, boss.”~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

McGee: “Spent the last four years in their electrical component department.”
Tony: “This is exciting stuff!”
McGee: “Tony, don’t jump to any conclusions, okay? Just ‘cause the guy has a nerdy job, it does not mean that he’s… Okay, he was… single. And he ran a Skyrim message board.”
Tony: “How many cats did he have?”
McGee: “None. But, apparently, he did have a thing for Japanese anime pillows.”
Tony: “Oh. That’s unfortunate… Although, she’s kinda hot.”
Ziva: “It’s a cartoon, Tony.”
Tony: “Hey, don’t knock the cartoon ladies. You got your Betty Rubble, your Ariel from The Little Mermaid, and Jessica Rabbit… Those ladies got me through puberty.”
Ziva: “You’ve been through puberty? Had not noticed.”
Tony: “Ha ha. Well, you noticed Jason King. What is it with chicks and firemen? And don’t say hoses.”
McGee: “I wasn’t going to.”
Ziva: “He’s not a fireman. But, yes, your cop friend is very, uhm… hot.”
Tony: “He’s not my friend. I met him once, 20 years ago… I’m actually kind of surprised he recognized me.”
Ziva: “Well, clearly, your first meeting was important to him.”
McGee: “I, uh… assume it involved a girl?”
Tony: “… He was nine years old.”
Gibbs: “Never assume, McGee.”
McGee: “Rule Number Eight. Got it, boss.”

~ 9x21 “Rekindled”

Palmer: “Excuse me, my friends. If I may have your attention, please?”McGee: “Looks like you’re about to burst into song, Jimmy.”Palmer: “Oh, it’s much better than that.”Ziva: “Why the coat on such a lovely day?”Tony: “Holy full-frontal, Autopsy Gremlin! Are you about to flash us your Magic Johnson?”Palmer: “Even. Better.”Tony: “… Wow.”Palmer: “What do you think? Well??”McGee: “Awesome!”Palmer: “Right?? So bad it’s good.”Tony: “I wouldn’t… go that far.”Palmer: “The wedding is in south Florida, so Breena and I originally were thinking tropical pastels. But then we saw this baby, and we thought… let’s go kitsch.”Ziva: “Kitsch. That is a German word.”Tony: “Yeah. Kitsch. Camp. Completely tacky.”McGee: “Don’t forget completely cool.”Tony: “Eye of the beholder, McCumberbund.”~ 9x20 “The Missionary Position”

Palmer: “Excuse me, my friends. If I may have your attention, please?”
McGee: “Looks like you’re about to burst into song, Jimmy.”
Palmer: “Oh, it’s much better than that.”
Ziva: “Why the coat on such a lovely day?”
Tony: “Holy full-frontal, Autopsy Gremlin! Are you about to flash us your Magic Johnson?”
Palmer: “Even. Better.”
Tony: “… Wow.”
Palmer: “What do you think? Well??”
McGee: “Awesome!”
Palmer: “Right?? So bad it’s good.”
Tony: “I wouldn’t… go that far.”
Palmer: “The wedding is in south Florida, so Breena and I originally were thinking tropical pastels. But then we saw this baby, and we thought… let’s go kitsch.”
Ziva: “Kitsch. That is a German word.”
Tony: “Yeah. Kitsch. Camp. Completely tacky.”
McGee: “Don’t forget completely cool.”
Tony: “Eye of the beholder, McCumberbund.”

~ 9x20 “The Missionary Position”

Ziva: “It’s been over an hour, and still not one word.”McGee: “I know… It’s heaven.”Ziva: “I’m worried, McGee. What if he’s sick?”McGee: “He’d be whining. He always whines when he’s sick.”Tony: “You two really suck at whispering. Believe it or not, I can hear you. And I’m not sick. Every once in a while, I just need to power down… Be still. Reflect on this little trip through the cosmic rip. I… I need to find my deep calm.”McGee: “Yeah, he’s sick.”Ziva: “Let’s check for a fever. What is this? … Last year’s performance appraisal review. Hah! How did you get this?”Tony: “The NCIS fairy left it under my pillow. What do you think??”McGee: “You stole it?”Ziva: “Ooh, McGee. Gibbs wrote something in the comment section: Agent DiNozzo displays exemplary skills, though he can be too talkative in the field.”McGee: “If, by too talkative, he means you never shut up…”Ziva: “Well, I think Gibbs was being a bit too gracious.”Tony: “After ten years, he doesn’t know this is how I work!”McGee: “I always thought it was like a mild case of Tourette’s or something.”Tony: “It’s my process! You guys know that. It-It’s how I focus, you know. I talk it out. Talkative. Hah! … Coming from a functional mute, that’s rich. Maybe that’s what he’s… Maybe that’s what he’s doing. He’s trying to tell me something… Maybe I should dial it back. Get… Get my quiet on.”McGee: “I think you’re, uh… overreacting a bit, Tony.”Tony: “I’m gonna kill the next performance appraisal. Next time he writes down, in his little margin here, DiNozzo: professional! DiNozzo: focused! DiNozzo…”Gibbs: “Too much yabba yabba.”Tony: “Sorry boss, I was… just… suppressing the yabba?”Gibbs: “Good.”~ 9x19 “The Good Son”

Ziva: “It’s been over an hour, and still not one word.”
McGee: “I know… It’s heaven.”
Ziva: “I’m worried, McGee. What if he’s sick?”
McGee: “He’d be whining. He always whines when he’s sick.”
Tony: “You two really suck at whispering. Believe it or not, I can hear you. And I’m not sick. Every once in a while, I just need to power down… Be still. Reflect on this little trip through the cosmic rip. I… I need to find my deep calm.”
McGee: “Yeah, he’s sick.”
Ziva: “Let’s check for a fever. What is this? … Last year’s performance appraisal review. Hah! How did you get this?”
Tony: “The NCIS fairy left it under my pillow. What do you think??”
McGee: “You stole it?”
Ziva: “Ooh, McGee. Gibbs wrote something in the comment section: Agent DiNozzo displays exemplary skills, though he can be too talkative in the field.”
McGee: “If, by too talkative, he means you never shut up…”
Ziva: “Well, I think Gibbs was being a bit too gracious.”
Tony: “After ten years, he doesn’t know this is how I work!”
McGee: “I always thought it was like a mild case of Tourette’s or something.”
Tony: “It’s my process! You guys know that. It-It’s how I focus, you know. I talk it out. Talkative. Hah! … Coming from a functional mute, that’s rich. Maybe that’s what he’s… Maybe that’s what he’s doing. He’s trying to tell me something… Maybe I should dial it back. Get… Get my quiet on.”
McGee: “I think you’re, uh… overreacting a bit, Tony.”
Tony: “I’m gonna kill the next performance appraisal. Next time he writes down, in his little margin here, DiNozzo: professional! DiNozzo: focused! DiNozzo…”
Gibbs: “Too much yabba yabba.”
Tony: “Sorry boss, I was… just… suppressing the yabba?”
Gibbs: “Good.”

~ 9x19 “The Good Son”

Ziva: “I am telling you, I saw a bounce in his step. And Elliott… Elliott was sure about Ryan’s pupils, as well.”Tony: “How am I gonna survive Gibbs dating a woman who thinks I’m a game show host? What does that even mean? Does she think I’m cheesy? That I like pencil-thin microphones?”McGee: “See, I don’t buy it. Gibbs is a lone wolf.”Ziva: “You have to be observant. Next time they come in here, you need to open your eyes and really look.”Gibbs: “Okay, what are we looking at?”~ 9x18 “The Tell”

Ziva: “I am telling you, I saw a bounce in his step. And Elliott… Elliott was sure about Ryan’s pupils, as well.”
Tony: “How am I gonna survive Gibbs dating a woman who thinks I’m a game show host? What does that even mean? Does she think I’m cheesy? That I like pencil-thin microphones?”
McGee: “See, I don’t buy it. Gibbs is a lone wolf.”
Ziva: “You have to be observant. Next time they come in here, you need to open your eyes and really look.”
Gibbs: “Okay, what are we looking at?”

~ 9x18 “The Tell”

McGee: “Hey, where you been, we’ve been calling? What’s going on?”Ziva: “Man day is over, and he is still ignoring us. I am not going to be ignored!”Tony: “Glenn Close, Fatal Attraction. Good one, Ziva. Your impression of… hot lady with crazy eyes is dead on, by the way. You are a… sphinx of a minx.” [opens MTAC’s door] “Game time fellas, just like we planned it.”Ziva: “Tony, do not try to talk your way out of this by calling me hot.”McGee: “He also called you crazy, Ziva.”Ziva: “Ooh, I will unleash crazy on him if he does not apologize for leaving me out of the loop.”Jarvis: “That won’t be necessary, Special Agent David.”~ 9x18 “The Tell”

McGee: “Hey, where you been, we’ve been calling? What’s going on?”
Ziva: “Man day is over, and he is still ignoring us. I am not going to be ignored!”
Tony: “Glenn Close, Fatal Attraction. Good one, Ziva. Your impression of… hot lady with crazy eyes is dead on, by the way. You are a… sphinx of a minx.” [opens MTAC’s door] “Game time fellas, just like we planned it.”
Ziva: “Tony, do not try to talk your way out of this by calling me hot.”
McGee: “He also called you crazy, Ziva.”
Ziva: “Ooh, I will unleash crazy on him if he does not apologize for leaving me out of the loop.”
Jarvis: “That won’t be necessary, Special Agent David.”

~ 9x18 “The Tell”

Ziva: “Hey, McGee! Vance is not here, either.”McGee: “Doesn’t his son have a soccer game in Alexandria?”Ziva: “No, that is next week. Tony is ignoring my calls, and it is very unlike Gibbs to just disappear like this. Something is going on.”McGee: “Actually, I think Tony said something about being on SecNav’s PSD today…”Ziva: “That’s probably a cover. I think they must be at some kind of… man day. You know, when men take a day to do man things together.”McGee: “Really??”Ziva: “Yes. And just because I am a woman, they do not have the courtesy to tell me where they are going or when they will be back!”McGee: “… I’m a man.”Ziva: “That’s right! … Which makes this even worse. I’m going to call Tony again.”~ 9x18 “The Tell”

Ziva: “Hey, McGee! Vance is not here, either.”
McGee: “Doesn’t his son have a soccer game in Alexandria?”
Ziva: “No, that is next week. Tony is ignoring my calls, and it is very unlike Gibbs to just disappear like this. Something is going on.”
McGee: “Actually, I think Tony said something about being on SecNav’s PSD today…”
Ziva: “That’s probably a cover. I think they must be at some kind of… man day. You know, when men take a day to do man things together.”
McGee: “Really??”
Ziva: “Yes. And just because I am a woman, they do not have the courtesy to tell me where they are going or when they will be back!”
McGee: “… I’m a man.”
Ziva: “That’s right! … Which makes this even worse. I’m going to call Tony again.”

~ 9x18 “The Tell”